( I moved this comment to the more appropriate post. No one ever googles “About”.)

RESPONSIBILITY
July 9, 2008
“Responsibility”… what charged “word.” It has so many meanings and interpretations for so many different people.

For Compulsive Gamblers, the world wants them to own up to their “responsibility” and not blame anyone for their addiction. For Alcoholics, people want personal “responsibility” for taking a drink. For Drug Addicts, they are to be “responsible” for the drugs they put into their systems. When thinking about “responsibility,” personal responsibility seems to be the theme of the day, and, I agree with all of those premises…I take responsibility for all that I have done.

But, when thinking about “responsibility,” our ideals seem to change, when a drunken driver kills our family member, or, one of our children is a “drug addict,” or, when our grandmother is eating out of a garbage can because she gambled away her social security checks in a casino.

The Dram Shop Act came about, not because of all the alcoholics with this addiction who took personal responsibility, but, because people were dying, and, realizing that this “responsibility” is one that must be shared. This “responsibility” must be shared by the provider and the customer.

The bar that served alcohol was finally legally responsible for letting alcoholics or over the limit drinkers, go too far in their intoxications, whether they were alcoholics or not. MADD came about from mothers losing children to drunken drivers. SADD came along because of students dying due to drunken driving accidents and alcoholics putting people at risk on the roads as a result of bars over serving them. The Dram Shop Act, in every state that has adopted it, resulted from deaths of innocent people drinking or not. But, the bars’ “responsibility” shifted in society’s eyes because of the havoc bar owners’ irresponsible service of alcohol had wreaked on communities. People said “enough” and change in the laws followed.

In the tobacco industry, many cases were won against the cigarette companies, due to their active concealment of the negative side effects cigarettes were causing to individuals. Cigarette companies had to come to terms with their “responsibility” in the millions of emphysemic and cancerous deaths of smokers worldwide. They took “responsibility” for their part in the health hazards caused by cigarette smoking and paid for it dearly…but, people had to die before any of that took place.

How many problem gamblers have to die before change occurs in this industry? As I sit in another Gambler’s Anonymous meeting and frown upon hearing about another person having attempted suicide, or another marriage lost, or, watch another young guy enter the room because gambling has destroyed his early existence…where does it end, or, where do we begin?

I say “we” because its “your” fight too!

I cannot continue to go on TV and tell people my story and the pain I am going through daily, when no one will stimulate change. I don’t care about the criticisms, I am used to that by now. But, I do care that this fight, by myself, might kill me. If others don’t come forward and initiate change, I risk my recovery for naught. When are those mothers going to step up for their addicted kids, when are those wives going to form organizations and say I lost my marriage because of compulsive gambling, when are the grandchildren of the elderly going to say, I miss my grandparents because they spend their leisure time addicted in casinos…???

This week they decide the fate of my case, do we move forward or back? Do they dismiss it, because my damages were not enough or do they move it forward, because something wrong happened here?

When thinking about “responsibility,” I am accepting mine, facing the criminal matter, facing the people I owe money to, facing the shame of what I have done…when will CASINO’S TAKE THEIRS!

You see, I never gambled alone, the CASINOS were right there with me!

When have you guys had enough? When your kid/husband/wife/grandparent/siblings die because of compulsive gambling?

When do you send those nasty emails I received to casinos and ask them to take responsibility for the destruction they cause daily? When do you ask them to own up to the crime, deaths and addictions they are nurturing?

If this happened to someone you loved, you would be devasted to know that CASINOS OWE NO ONE A DUTY OF EVEN THE MOST MINOR CARE WHEN THEY ENTER A CASINO. Doesn’t that scare you?

This week is a big week for me. I have a lot of soul searching to do. Whether this case moves forward or not, CAN I KEEP FIGHTING THIS FIGHT ALONE? Will “ye” of little faith and much criticism step out of anonymity and start doing something…anything…to protect the future for your children against compulsive gambling. Because a casino is popping up everywhere. Let’s hope it’s not in your living room, with your child or husband, in your marriage, in your economic structures….because you didn’t realize that 88% of students are gambling, there are bookies on campuses, poker games every night of the week in dorms, there is kiddie bingo and poker at church events, there are slots at every rest stop in America, gambling is spreading like wildfire! Why are we not putting “brakes” or “safety mechanisms” in place to protect our loved ones? I am not sure I am strong enough or economically blest enough to continue alone. I am asking you to “step up,” do something, stop criticizing me because it easier, God knows I make it easy and do something!

Let’s say I win, who gives me back my time lost? I will have to be in treatment until the end of my days. Who will replace the time away from my mother, my family…what amount of money will give me back my credibility, honesty or restore my shame? Did you know that sometimes I still cry myself to sleep? Or. that there are days when going forward is a challenge for me? Maybe I deserve all of this, but, others don’t.

They deserve to enter a Casino and be safe, because there are protective measures in place when their gambling has gotten out of hand…We lost lives getting the Dram Shop Act, we lost victims to cigarettes, let us not lose more gamblers before Change is adopted!!!